Top NFL Officials' Complaints:

After shooting the blank gun to end the half, the Dallas
Cowboy players start shooting back with live ammunition.

Players get "the wave". . . refs get "the finger".

Anyone who makes a call against the Detroit Lions risks
pissing off their last remaining fan.

With Reggie White retired, the penalty for "Illegal use
of a racial slur" is meaningless.

Just when we thought it was safe to be an NFL Ref, we
have to go back to frickin' CLEVELAND!!!

Thanks to instant replay, picking nose during a game is
twice as risky.

Everyone else gets to wear their Autumn colors, but for
me it's black and white week after week after week!

Don King only bribes boxing judges.

Official rulebooks not made in Braille.

I'm the one that everybody wants to kill, so where's MY
helmet and pads?!